Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Continuing on...

My mother died on March 3rd. She was almost 94 years old and had been having mini-strokes for years. Six weeks before she died, she had another while she was walking down the hall at her assisted-living residence and she fell. She was unable to walk or talk after that, or feed herself, or sit up... basically, she lost most of her functions. When she was returned to her residence, it was to the full-support floor and her day started at 8am when she was fed and wheeled in her bad to a sunroom, where she spent all day until 5pm. At 5pm, she was wheeled back to her room. So, it was difficult to hope she would remain alive under those circumstances. Poor mom... I just know that she wouldn't have wanted to die the way she did - slowly over a period of years. Anyway, I am now motherless. But, since mother didn't recognize me since 2003, I suppose I've had some time to get used to that feeling. I wasn't sad when she died like I was sad when my father died.

Age may have something to do with a person's sadness level. I was 42 and an emotional wreck (because of a lot of things) when dad died.... page ahead 26 years and mother's death was almost anti-climactic... to me. Maybe not for my brother who took care of her for so many years. He must miss her.

I have to post more often. There are a lot of things happening in my life that I want to talk about... and lots of things not happening, or happening to other people that I want to talk about too. But I'll save some of that for later. It feels good to be back after a long, dry spell.

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